Five Buckys

Little August Abram, you listen when we read books and you help turn the pages. You laugh when I make the animal noises. I like this about you. Little August Abram, you cuddle when you watch shows. Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Doc McStuffins, and Daniel Tiger are your favorites. Daddy likes to watch with you. He likes those shows too, but we both know he does it for the cuddles. Just before taking this picture, he picked up your foot and said, “I think he has my toes”. I like this about you. Little August Abram, you have come around to letting me wear you while we are out shopping. You usually fall asleep and I can feel your sweet heavy sleeping breath against my chest and it’s as if you are my newborn baby all over again. I like this about you. Little August Abram, you would spend the entire day practicing walking and jumping, if I let you. You pull up on the couch next to me, reach out one hand for mine, and as soon as you see my hand reach for yours, you let go completely. And for a spli

If you peeked inside of this little home, you’d find right there on the floor a neglected band practice of all the pots and pans and all the wooden spoons. You’d find every board book wet with slobber, hanging halfway read. You’d find an impressive floor display of all sorts of toys. You’d find clothes that need to be folded, clothes that need to be washed. You’d find cheerios, so many cheerios. If you peeked inside this little home,  you’d find a crawling baby with pink knees and a runny nose. A baby too curious to focus on one activity. A baby who wants to be held and not held. And you’d find an exhausted lady in need of a nap. A lady who could use a good hair washing and a hug. A lady who is showing up because she loves that baby and those knees and that nose. And will one day, one day love those teeth. Not today.

These days We show this Daddy how to play guitar. These days We pull up and bounce on anything! everything! all day long! These days Nothing makes us both laugh more than tummy kisses, except for maybe nose nibbles. Yep, definitely the nose nibbles. These days   We play on the big bed.  These days We give teething the side eye. These days We are extra adorable and make this lady here very silly happy.

Sometimes motherhood looks like a tired lady still in her pajamas at an embarrassing hour along with an embarrassing amount of empty Easter candy wrappers nearby. And a baby who doesn’t want to cuddle. He’d much rather climb up the walls and slobber all over and bark at me from across the room because his teeth hurt.  I try to reason with him that cuddling would be the answer to both of our problems, but no cuddles. He is too busy. So it’s about that time that the Rolos and miniature Reese’s cups start to give me energy. And the energy wakes up my mind enough to form fantastic ideas. "Picnic!" I exclaim to Gus. He stares at me. Blinks twice and then smiles. He doesn’t smile because of picnic!, he smiles because I look at him and talk to him and he likes my attention. This makes me feel guilty because I realize I was just sitting there, being barked at, eating Easter candy, in pajamas, at 10:30am. And that’s when I decide that bubbles will be a part of this picnic, he deserves

We spent our weekend in Williamsburg, Virginia. The Buchanan three: an excited father who just wanted to share all the facts on everything Williamsburg, a sad teething baby who just wanted to practice crawling, and an exhausted mother who just wanted to smell all the handmade soaps.   We eventually gave in to the baby’s squirms and sat our butts in the grass to let Gus pet the grass and crawl around. And for a little while, August didn’t even seem to remember his two tiny terrible teeth. This made us all happy.  And from out there on the grass, with a happy little guy discovering his shadow and a man who makes fatherhood look so handsome, I say you are welcome, Williamsburg.  Maybe a fter we have all of our teeth and enough money to buy   all   the soaps.  we’ll grace you with our presence again.

Food. He will try anything and he likes everything. His first taste of something new involves shutting his eyes, wrinkling his nose, doing a little body shiver, and then quickly opening back up for some more. I could watch him try new things all day. Muscles. He pulls up and stands on his own two legs now. He’s proud of this trick. He’ll be playing in his playroom and I’ll be reading nearby and then up pops a little smiling head at the tip of the sofa. He waits for his much deserved applause and kiss on the head and then he slowly bends his knees and sits on his bottom and crawls away just to set the stage to do it again. Crawling. He can crawl on all fours now. We were at our baby music class the first day that he crawled on all fours. I totally wanted to mom-geek out about it. But I was in front of all these veteran moms whose kids were doing things like jumping and talking in sentences and wearing shoes. I really wished Jared was there to balance my mom-geek with his dad-geek but h

On Easter Sunday, a dapper young gentleman accompanied us to church. He was handsome and sweet and happy and all the qualities that make a mother and father puff up their chests in pride. I spent most of the service thanking the Risen King for loving me so much and for loving Jared so much and for loving August so much. Along with a heart swelling thanks for giving the three of us each other. After church, we went downtown to hunt for Easter eggs. Jared found one that rattled with a jellybean and August thought that was just super. Jared ate the jellybean, August ate the egg, and I held the umbrella. And that is the tale our only Easter family photo tells. When we got home, we ignored the dirty dishes and took a family nap. Then when we woke up, we held each other close because God is so good.  I belong to these two. And they belong to me. And that’s the way God has always planned. And that is just the kind of Easter I like to celebrate.